Greetings Mouthketeers (People who have subscribed to The Mouthinator blog):

Do you need a bigger box?  Well if I were you, I’d reserve ahead because this next story made my cellulite sizzle.  (That’s right worldwide web fans, men have cellulite.)  Did you hear about the investigation in South Carolina where someone at a funeral parlor severed a dead man’s legs in order to fit his bod in a casket?  (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1166680/Funeral-home-accused-cutting-mans-legs-make-fit-coffin.html)  

Hey, it’s hard enough to fit into skinny jeans these days; but shedding a few limbs in order to fit into a box takes body sculpting to a whole new level, don’t you think?   The truth remains:  Whether we are dead or alive, America wants us all to be thinner.   I don’t know about you, but I have struggled with weight for years—have gained and lost 60 pounds about 6 times—and have various wardrobes ranging from sizes 30 to 44.  Recently, I decided that instead of squeezing into a smaller pant size, (as if I’m CinderFella looking to cram my foot into a glass slipper), I decided to give myself a break and buy bigger outfits so I can let my body breathe.  

So, when it’s time for me to die, I’d really like a bigger box so I can come up for a little air.  

Do you want or need a bigger box?  Needs vs. Wants.  Hmmmmmmmm.    

Peace.  

The Mouthinator.   

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